Whilst most brides relish the thought of planning their wedding day no one wants to be stressed on their big day.

Your wedding day needs to be relaxing and above all enjoyable. If you are stressing about last-minute things or taking calls from vendors, then stressed if what you are going to be.

Here are some tips to ensure your wedding day is stress free!


In the lead-up to your wedding.

Try to have a capable team of people around you, either paid or unpaid. This will allow you to focus on being calm and relaxed and enjoying the day for what it is- a celebration of the love you hold for each other.


A wedding planner.

If it is in your budget engage a wedding planner. You are only organising one wedding in your lifetime (hopefully), whereas a wedding planner is doing this every day. They are a professional and know what the hurdles are, what needs to be organised by when, what could go wrong and how to fix all those last-minute hiccups.

If your budget doesn’t allow for a paid wedding planner to help organise everything from the start, then think about hiring a day coordinator. Even if you are super organised and have everything covered, a day coordinator can handle everything on the day. You need to feel like a special guest at your wedding, not someone hired in to fix every little problem that arises.

Make sure someone else, preferably your wedding planner or day coordinator is totally familiar with what your vision is for the day and has a final copy of the run sheet.

Your vendors.

Make sure you engage experienced reputable vendors and then let them do their thing. They will get on with the job and have contingencies plans for any issues that arise, but they will also be able to advise and guide you along the way. You do not want to engage vendors that you are needing to continual checking up on, or wondering if they are doing what you paid them to do.


Outdoor wedding? Have a backup plan.

If you are having any part of your wedding day outside, have an inclement weather option i.e. marquee on standby if it is forecast to rain on the day. Make the call a couple of days out, if it is forecast to rain then enact your wet weather plan so there is not a last-minute scramble. Even if it is not raining on the day, at least you have the peace of mind that you have a dry option if needed.


Plan, plan and plan so more.

Be supper organised from the start.

There are plenty of wedding day planning systems that you can download for free, be it a simple spreadsheet to a full-on website. This can take care of things like timeline, checklist, vendors contact details, invoice payment dates, guest list and budget.

Stick to your timeline and complete tasks as necessary.


Keep your day as simple as possible.

The more complicated the day the more stress involved.

  • If hiring equipment and furniture, get everything you need from one vendor.
  • Can your caterer do drinks, food, and the cake rather than have 3 different vendors.
  • Do you really have to make all your own favors? Sometimes it is just easy and just as meaningful to purchase something thoughtful that the guest will appreciate just as much.
  • Keeping it simple even extends to food choices. Choose something that most of your guests will like. You will never be able to please everyone.
  • If the reception venue can supply flowers for the tables let them, rather than trying to organise an aunt or a sister to do it. Along with all the stress of where to get flowers, vases, etc. and then them having to check in with you whilst you are having your hair done to see if they are ok is just a hassle. It may cost a little more, but leave it to the professionals, they do this every day.
  • Think carefully about how much time and effort will go into each aspect of the day and try to eliminate all the last minutes have-to-do’s.


The DIY wedding.

If you are still keen to do a DIY wedding, then learn to delegate.

Allocate tasks to very capable people and let them just do the job. Planning a wedding is not a one-person job operation. Enlist the help of your family and friends. Do a contra deal with someone you know who is also getting married. They do a certain amount for you on your wedding day and then you reciprocate for theirs.

Some of the things that are easy to delegate:

  • Addressing, filling and sending invitations either electronically or hard copy.
  • Tracking RSVPs, last-minute changes to he seating plan and putting out place cards. This is where a friend or family member with good attention to detail can step in and save the day. Obviously, some of these tasks will need to be in consultation with the bride and groom but on the day, armed with a good seating plan, they can set everything up as you wish.
  • Have a friend organise favors and get them to the reception and placed on tables. Then at the end of the reception, they can then take away any remaining favours from the venue.
  • Have someone in charge of organising groups for photos. A photo run sheet will help here then your photo person can make sure everyone who is to be in photos is aware of when they are needed so they can be easily located for their time slot.
  • Organise someone to be responsible for picking up cards and presents at the end of the evening so nothing gets left behind

A run sheet for the day, with clear instructions, should be distributed to all key persons. This will ensure everyone knows what they need to do and when, so they do not have to come to you with questions.


Get your communications right.

Especially with your guests. Minimise contact with your guests by providing all the information on a wedding website or including a particulars card with your wedding invitations, which offers maps and all the information they might need. Using a website to automate your RSVP system could also spare you a lot of last-minute headaches.

Have a go-to person who is across the day and knows what you want and what you have envisaged for the day.

On the day give your phone to your go-to person for the day let them deal with calls from vendors or guests who may be lost, not sure of timing, running late etc. This could be your maid of honor, your groomsman, your mum or your wedding planner – but it most certainly shouldn’t be the bride or groom!



Set a budget and stick to it, with a little slush fund for unexpected costs which can occur. Going over budget, especially on last-minute things, can be the biggest cause of stress leading up to and on your wedding day.

Wedding. Glass jar with coins and an inscription is wedding and symbol of family or couple. Man holds coin in his hand



Set Deadlines.

And stick to them! Your to-do list will seem a lot less daunting if you break it up into sections and establish realistic but non-negotiable dates for when each task needs to be completed.


Keep your wedding day schedule as simple as possible.

It is tempting to organise a family breakfast or have time with your besties that aren’t in the bridal party on your wedding day. Don’t, if it’s going to add to the stress! The day is about you!

Have the family orfriends get together the day before, or is it necessary at all given they will be spending much of the wedding day together?

Avoid having all the last-minute beauty stuff on the day – have your manicures, pedicures etc. in the days leading up your wedding day, just leaving hair and make-up to be done on the big day.

Any spare time should be spent relaxing and resting. It will be a huge day, so take it easy so you can enjoy it.


Think carefully about your dress and shoes for the day.

Looking amazing on the day is important, but being comfortable and enjoying the day is a must. So if the amazing dress and shoes that you have chosen will be difficult to get around in or be uncomfortable, think about a change of dress and footware after the photos have been taken.

It goes without saying that any shoes should be broken in somewhat. A blister on the day will be very painful and has the potential to take all the joy out of your wedding day.

Have an emergency kit packed and with you on the day – just a few things you may need, like bobby pins, safety pins, sunscreen, breath mints, bandaid, painkillers (in case of that headache because you have not kept hydrated), a small sewing kit just in case etc. Give this to your go-to person, so it’s one less thing you have to carry and worry about.


Make sure all your vendors payments have been paid.

Many of these payments are due shortly before the wedding day, so get them paid so you are not having to deal with requests in the days leading up to your wedding day

If you have vendors that require payment on the day, organise someone else to be responsible for making sure this gets done.



On the day.

  • (try to) Get a good nights sleep the night before
  • Have a good breakfast
  • Drink plenty of water to stay hydrated
  • Have a stash of snacks in case you get hungry. Again, your go-to person will be great for this
  • Allow extra time for hair and makeup – this is often the area that unexpectedly runs over time
  • Have your bouquets/boutonnieres delivered early to get those gorgeous preparation photos you want
  • Give your phone to your designated person as early as possible on the day
  • Try and stick to your schedule so you don’t stress about being late
  • Find a space and allow some time to just sit quietly and relax before walking down the aisle.
  • Have the celebrant ask everyone to turn off their phone so you don’t have them ringing in the middle of the ceremony
  • Even if you love everyone in the crowd, it is nice to find time to have a little time out during the day, especially just the two of you
  • Make sure you organise with the caters to have a meal delivered to you when it is hot and at a time you have time to eat it
  • Make sure the MC sticks to the schedule, especially with speeches – making people stick to their allotted time and not allowing extra speakers on the day

Most importantly, don’t lose sight of what the day is about. It is a celebration of your marriage. Understand you cannot control everything and that there will be things that will not go to plan.

Just breathe, regardless of what happens. None of it matters when you’re marrying the person you love and want to spend the rest of your life with.

The Secret Garden Team x